📚 Purposeful by Jennifer Dulski

November 27, 2022

Author: Jennifer Dulski
Full Title: Purposeful
Finished Date: November 2022

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Rating: 4 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️🌑

Purposeful bridges stories from for-profit. non-profit, and grassroots experiences - a glimpse into author Jen Dulski's varied professional successes - to frame the concept of movements.

Movements are values-driven and empower people to serve the purpose. They have passionate supporters, loyal customers, and turn existing power structures. Movements, done well, can move mountains.

I found this book to be well-written and to share valuable wisdom. I also found myself wishing for greater depth or more rigorous pushing of the movements model. Perhaps because I recognize much of the cited literature and expected recommendations. For example, all of the stories in the book are movements that succeeded. Were there any movements that had all the same characteristics described here, but failed? What set those apart? Or what about movements that don't have these characteristics but still succeed? Why do they work when they are outside these bounds?

A more rigorous approach to intellectual framing would address Type I and Type II errors. But that's not really the point.

The point, as I understand it, is a small set of simple, actionable steps to increase and accelerate movement-making. Simple, yes. Easy, no. The concepts offered here, executed well, are certain to improve outcomes in a wide array of domains.

Starting a movement around movements is so meta (before it was Meta).

Overarching Notes

Movements are an expression of deep-seated values that create enough structure to empower people to join and serve the collective purpose.

Purpose is productive and contagious. People who are inspired tend to be more creative while also inspiring others.

Four reasons most people don't take action to create change:

  1. They don't believe they can succeed
  2. They lack support
  3. They don't have the tools
  4. They don't have the funding

A vision is your desired future; purpose is the reason why you want it

Marshall Ganz of Harvard Kennedy argues that a public narrative has three parts:

  • a story of self
  • a story of us
  • and a story of now

For anything with desired social impact, create a Theory of Change

To understand key payers, create a "power map" or "influence map"

Five stages of engagement

  1. Denial
  2. Listening
  3. Acceptance
  4. Embracing
  5. Empower

Platinum rule - treat others how they would like to be treated

Motivational pie chart exercise

  • Write down categories for everything that motivates you at work (no limit)
  • Weight each category by importance to you (adds up to 100)
  • Color code satisfaction in each category (red, yellow, green)
  • --
  • As a manager, have open conversation how you can get to green in every category
  • Expect motivators to change and check back often

Well-communicated purpose attracts, retains, and unifies people

  • Regularly tell stories of individuals or customers impacted by your offering
  • Host events to cement community and inspire supporters

Identify metrics that define success (financially as well as within Theory of Change) and diligently track progress

To motivate individuals, appropriately challenge.

Pygmalion Effect - when authority figure's positive expectations lead to improved performance

Trust and support improve teammate performance and respect + trust for team lead.

^^People should be able to make 90% of decisions that are required for their job.^^

  • If not, they may not be empowered enough

For clarity and transparency, use decision logs:

  • What decision was made
  • By whom
  • On which date
  • The primary rationale
  • Who was consulted

When asking for advice, one is seen as smarter

Horizons career framework

  • Part 1 - List all jobs to date and then add bullets for skills / lessons gained at each job
  • Part 2 - Describe your dream job 10 years out. What skills are necessary for that job?
  • Part 3 - Identify the gaps from 1 & 2 then craft a plan to fill them

Storytelling and relationship building are critical skills in any movement - master them

Staying late when the team has extra work earns leaders respect

Vulnerability can serve to build tighter connections

Remember your teammates / supporters are people with families and lives to tend to

Be aware of fundamental attribution error and other biases #[[cognitive biases]]

Lifelines exercise

  • Small groups - everyone describe 3-5 key moments or events in their lives that have influenced who they are today
  • Tell a story from that moment in time / why that is important

^^Appreciation builds trust^^ (and can easily be overlooked)

  • At the end of a project or an off-site, ask the group to share what they appreciate about each other

"Tools that build deeper understanding between people add value to teams of any kind"

  • Challenge point - beyond the shared sense of humanity, what value is built? What are the signals of this value and how can we tell when it has been realized?

Be prepared for criticism

  • Communicate with supporters to buttress your sense of purpose during hard times
  • Recognize even hurtful feedback can be useful

Bear Hug technique - embracing detractors

Festival of Failures - openly share failures with team to normalize and destigmatize mistakes

Reinforce and incentivize growth mindset with concrete team policies

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Favorite Quotes:

From others

  • "Anyone who thinks that they are too small to make a difference has never tried to fall asleep with a mosquito in the room. —CHRISTINE TODD WHITMAN
  • "Don’t raise your voice; improve your argument." —DESMOND TUTU
  • "starting a community is like hosting a cocktail party. When people arrive, you need to take their coats, offer them drinks, introduce them to a few people—make them feel comfortable (and step in if someone else insults them)." —Caterina Fake, founder of Flickr
  • "This thing that we call “failure” is not the falling down, but the staying down." —MARY PICKFORD

From the author

  • "Purpose is contagious."
  • "Why not me?" -Jen's mom
  • "Everybody's got something."
  • "The key to success is holding on to the belief that you'll have more sunny days than cloudy ones, and just keep climbing, every day, no matter what."
  • -- Incidentally, the latter is more important than the former. It's just the former makes everything arbitrarily more enjoyable.

Further areas [[To Research]]

[[John Kotter]] and [[James Heskett]], authors of Corporate Culture and Performance, on how they defined purposeful companies and how that contrasts with non-values-driven organizations

The Business Case for Purpose, a report from Harvard Business Review Analytics sponsored by the EY Beacon Institute

[[Marshall Ganz]], a senior lecturer in public policy at the Harvard Kennedy School of Government and a social organizing expert

Center for [[Theory of Change]], a nonprofit that promotes standards and best practices for implementing a Theory of Change

[[Alison Wood Brooks]] and [[Francesca Gino]] of Harvard Business School on asking advice

StoryCorps piece that originally aired on NPR’s Latino USA from 2008 re:Julio Diaz giving his jacket to mugger

Dr. [[Gail Matthews]] at Dominican University of California with 2015 study regarding goal setting & accomplishing techniques

[[Derek Sivers]] - How to start a movement

[[Adam Grant]] - motivational maintenance

  • Wharton professor and bestselling author Adam Grant: A. M. Grant, E. M. Campbell, G. Chen, K. Cottone, D. Lapedis, and K. Lee, “Impact and the Art of Motivation Maintenance: The Effects of Contact with Beneficiaries on Persistence Behavior, Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes 103 (2007), 53–67. (Location 2858)

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Book Highlights

Anyone who thinks that they are too small to make a difference has never tried to fall asleep with a mosquito in the room. —CHRISTINE TODD WHITMAN (Location 45)

They built their movements by empowering people around them both to serve the purpose and to spread the movement even further. (Location 159)

  • Note: How to fold this in to GIFT?

Purpose is contagious. Movements grow and spread with a force of their own to create communities of people, each burning to make the change happen. While movements are often sparked by the actions and conviction of an effective leader, they succeed when those movement starters build up other leaders within the community and everyone plays a role in driving change. (Location 160)

powerful because of the titles on their business cards; they are powerful because they have their mission and values front and center, and their clarity of purpose and strength of conviction inspire others to join them—to start a movement. (Location 170)

^^Successful leadership requires you to create a clear vision of what you want to achieve, inspire other people to work with you toward that vision, often persuade people in power (decision-makers) to do things you want them to do, overcome obstacles that may arise, and then just not give up until the vision is achieved.^^ (Location 183)

Those leaders who frame their work as movements with passionate followers will ultimately build the strongest teams and have the most success, (Location 186)

According to John Kotter and James Heskett, authors of Corporate Culture and Performance, purposeful companies had consistently higher stock prices—by a factor of twelve—than non-values-driven organizations. The Business Case for Purpose, a report from Harvard Business Review Analytics sponsored by the EY Beacon Institute, contends that companies that “harness the power of purpose to drive performance and profitability enjoy a distinct competitive advantage”—58 percent of companies with a clearly articulated sense of purpose in their corporate mission reported growth of more than 10 percent during the three years they were followed, as compared with 42 percent of companies that don’t prioritize purpose. (Location 219)

Companies that understand the increasing emphasis of purpose in today’s professional landscape improve their ability to attract such employees and also their ability to retain them for longer periods of time.” (Location 227)

^^four basic reasons why most people don’t take action to try to create change: They don’t believe they can succeed. They lack support. They don’t have the tools. They have no funding.^^ (Location 360)

  • Note: Very close to my three reasons not to thrive

it’s that first one—not believing in your own ability to effect change—that keeps most people from getting started. (Location 364)

Ben Rattray, the founder of Change.org, calls “love privilege” because I always felt loved and supported by my family. (Location 375)

don’t need to harbor the guilt that can come with privilege, but rather take advantage of the opportunity to use that privilege to do something that matters. (Location 390)

but rather someone who had always said, ^^“Why not me?”^^ when it came to issues in the world she believed needed to be addressed. (Location 407)

That question—Why not me?—is central to whether or not we will go through life daring to participate in improving the world. (Location 415)

A vision is your desired future; the purpose is the reason why you want it. Ask yourself: How do you want the world to look? Why does it matter for the world to change in this way? (Location 610)

Once you have a clear vision (the desired future or the where) and purpose (the why), you can then create a mission (the what), strategies and tactics (the how), and goals and objectives (the how well) so you can make sure that you are on the right path toward achieving your vision. (Location 621)

Communicate your vision with visceral stories to help people deeply understand what it is and why it matters. (Location 625)

You can also highlight individual stories to show how the vision will have an impact on people rather than leaving it in broad, general terms. Politicians are masters of this technique. While advocating for particular policies, they often invite individuals or families who might be affected to join the audience at a speech they are giving. The presence of these people makes vision and purpose more accessible. (Location 627)

Marshall Ganz, a senior lecturer in public policy at the Harvard Kennedy School of Government and a social organizing expert well known for his work with the United Farm Workers, goes a level deeper in utilizing storytelling as a strategy. He argues that a public narrative has three parts: a story of self, a story of us, and a story of now. A story of self covers your own personal purpose—your calling and why it matters to you. It may include personal challenges you have had to overcome or particular people or experiences that motivate you. A story of us describes the community of people you want to join you, and what you have in common that will inspire them to do so. Here you should focus on stories about shared identity and values and how those shared values can persuade them to act. And a story of now explains the urgency around acting quickly. In this story, Ganz suggests that you focus on the challenge you are facing jointly with your supporters, specific actions you want them to take, and the vision that can be achieved if they take this action with you now. Ganz has published worksheets you can find online that will walk you through how to create your own public narrative using story of self, story of us, and story of now. (Location 630)

Theory of Change as a means to maximize the chances of success for a desired change. This method involves starting with the goals you want to achieve and then identifying the necessary preconditions to reach those goals and the links between each outcome along the way. (Location 735)

Center for Theory of Change, a nonprofit that promotes standards and best practices for implementing a Theory of Change. (Location 759)

THE WORK YOU do to create a clear and compelling vision—of articulating and refining what you want to create and why—will pay off when starting your movement. (Location 865)

Don’t raise your voice; improve your argument. —DESMOND TUTU (Location 871)

This is similar to the technique we’ll discuss in Chapter 5, inspiring supporters—the better you understand what motivates people, the more easily you can inspire them to take action. (Location 951)

ORGANIZERS USE A technique called “power mapping” or “influence mapping” to formalize the process that Gemma outlines. It asks you to understand the spheres of relationships and motivators that influence your decision-maker. (Location 983)

As you go through this exercise, it’s important to clearly understand and denote any relationships between the people on your map. How many connections are there between key people, and how strong are those connections? How likely would each of those people or institutions be to support your idea? Are there primary and secondary decision-makers, and if so, how are they related? Are there any smaller asks you can start with that will help build to the bigger and final ask? This process will also help you clarify the order in which you approach people to get to the ultimate decision-maker, starting with the strongest connections and those most likely to support your idea. (Location 986)

^^Five Stages of Engagement: denial, listening, acceptance, embracing, and empowering. ^^(Location 1214)

1. DENIAL (Location 1220)

If you can help decision-makers understand that taking action may not only protect their reputation but also be better for their business, you’ll have a better chance of getting the outcome you want. (Location 1232)

2. LISTENING (Location 1234)

The second stage is listening, when decision-makers can’t or aren’t yet ready to do what is being asked of them, but want to engage and have a dialogue to show they are willing to hear feedback. (Location 1234)

If you let decision-makers know that you are open to starting with a conversation in which all parties can express their perspectives, it can serve as a starting point to prompt potential action. There may be alternative solutions to a problem that can only be discovered by listening to each other. (Location 1251)

3. ACCEPTANCE (Location 1254)

Stage three is acceptance: decision-makers listen to the people asking them for change, agree that what they are asking for makes sense, and then decide to do what is being asked of them. It is just “acceptance,” though, because while they agree to make the change, they don’t go any further to more deeply engage with their customers or constituents around it, or promote it to make it a core part of their platform or brand. (Location 1254)

4. EMBRACING (Location 1266)

The fourth stage of engagement is embracing, when decision-makers actively embrace the requests from the people who are asking them for change. They make changes that go beyond what movement leaders ask for, and potentially promote the changes that they are making in order to cultivate an even more loyal and excited set of customers or constituents. (Location 1267)

5. EMPOWERING (Location 1282)

In this final stage, decision-makers actually empower their consumers or their constituents to act on their behalf and to become advocates in support of the causes the decision-makers care about. (Location 1283)

So, as a movement starter, ask decision-makers: “Do you want to lead, or do you want to follow?” Helping decision-makers understand the benefit of being in the vanguard of change can be one of the most effective persuasion tools. (Location 1305)

a team is made up of individuals—and you build a movement by motivating every single person on your team to fight for the cause. (Location 1327)

It is often referred to as the ^^“platinum” rule: instead of using the “golden” rule of treating other people as you would like to be treated, treat them as they would like to be treated.^^ (Location 1342)

Motivational Pie Chart (Location 1347)

Choose categories: Write down categories for everything that motivates you at work—recognition, compensation, learning new things, a flexible schedule, etc. You can write as many or as few things as you want, and there are no preset categories. Anything that matters to you can go on your list. Assign weighting: Give each category a percentage weighting in order of its importance to you. The total weightings should add up to 100 percent, thus giving you a comprehensive pie chart of the things that motivate you. Color code satisfaction levels: Use a “red, yellow, green” color-coding system to rate how satisfied you currently are with each of the categories on the list. If you are very satisfied with your compensation, give it a green. If you are completely dissatisfied with how challenged you feel in your job, give that a red, and so on. (Location 1350)

If you are using the ^^tool as a team leader, the next step is to have an open conversation with each person on your team to talk about ways you can work together to get your team member to green on the categories they chose^^. Understanding what makes people happy is a great way to make sure they stay motivated on your team and support your movement. (Location 1358)

Note that the pie chart can and does change over time. That is to be expected—just as our lives and careers change, so do our motivations. (Location 1374)

1. CHAMPION PURPOSE (Location 1380)

PURPOSE IS A BRIDGE BUILDER (Location 1383)

Movements are often most effective when they unite many disparate threads and appeal to many different people. A clear sense of purpose can provide a source of unity. (Location 1384)

EXPOSE YOUR TEAM TO STORIES OF PURPOSE (Location 1409)

Within existing organizations, leaders are also more effective when they keep the organization’s purpose at the forefront. One of the best ways to do that is by making the stories of people who are affected by your vision front and center. (Location 1410)

You can have a smaller, more frequent meetings like Plum and Change.org do; you can have bigger, less frequent, but more intense events that bring people together, like eBay Live, a conference that brought together buyers, sellers, and eBay staff; or you can do both. (Location 1425)

Big events like this can help cement community, not only between your team and the people who use your product or support your cause, but also among the supporters. (Location 1428)

EXTEND YOUR PURPOSE TO OTHERS (Location 1433)

A clear purpose can help you not only to keep a team inspired but also to build an amazing team in the first place. (Location 1449)

TRACK YOUR PROGRESS (Location 1450)

In order to know whether you’re making a difference, you need to track your progress. Often, people track core metrics that have to do with business success, like revenue and audience growth, but neglect to track the metrics that actually correspond to their vision and Theory of Change. Admittedly, it’s not always easy to find metrics that align perfectly when it’s likely that the vision you are aiming to achieve is something that hasn’t been done before. But even though measuring impact isn’t as neat and clean as simply measuring revenue or daily active users, it is critical to inspiring your team. (Location 1451)

2. CULTIVATE GROWTH (Location 1469)

one of the most effective ways to keep individuals and teams motivated is to continually challenge them. (Location 1470)

THE POWER OF HIGH EXPECTATIONS (Location 1473)

Research has demonstrated for years that high expectations have the power to improve performance. Experts call this phenomenon the Pygmalion Effect. Named after a sculptor in a Greek myth who fell in love with a statue he carved, the Pygmalion Effect occurs when an authority figure’s positive expectations lead to the improved performance of another person. (Location 1474)

As Zenger and Folkman describe in Harvard Business Review, “The people who’d received more positive ratings felt lifted up and supported. And that vote of confidence made them more optimistic about future improvement. Conversely, subordinates rated by the consistently tougher managers were confused or discouraged—often both. They felt they were not valued or trusted, and that it was impossible to succeed.” The actual belief that leaders had in the people on their team became a self-fulfilling prophecy, leading the people who felt their managers believed in them to actually improve. (Location 1487)

And not only do people perform better when they feel trusted and supported, they also respect and trust their leaders more, too. (Location 1495)

90/10 DECISION-MAKING (Location 1524)

The core idea is that people should be able to make roughly 90 percent of the decisions that are required for them to get their job done. The remaining 10 percent of decisions may require sign-off or approval. If this isn’t happening, either you’re asking people to do things that you shouldn’t be asking them to do, or you’re not empowering them as much as you should be. (Location 1526)

Creating structural clarity like this helps to ensure that (a) people get to make enough of their own decisions to feel trusted and empowered, and (b) people have a common language for discussing decision-making in a clear, nonthreatening way. (Location 1536)

Typically, a decision log tracks which decisions were made, by whom, on which dates, the primary rationale, and who was consulted. A decision log can help in two ways: First, it shows you whether people on your team are actually able to make most of their decisions on their own. If it turns out that’s not the case, the log provides a good starting point for open discussions between leaders and people on their teams. (Location 1539)

Second, it provides visibility for people on the team who weren’t involved in the decision. In leadership-level meetings at Google, we would track all of our major decisions and distribute the log to our full teams following the meeting. It created complete transparency about what decisions were made, by whom, and why. (Location 1543)

GROWTH THROUGH DIVERSITY (Location 1545)

SEEK ADVICE (Location 1581)

Research by Alison Wood Brooks and Francesca Gino of Harvard Business School showed in multiple studies that when people ask for advice, they are seen as smarter and more likable by those they ask, primarily because people like to be asked for advice—it makes them in turn feel smart and appreciated. (Location 1599)

IMAGINE THE HORIZON (Location 1604)

The Horizon Conversation has three parts. (Location 1608)

The first is an assessment of the skills you’ve already learned, based on the roles you’ve had so far in your life. The initial step is to go back through your life and say, “These are all of my experiences,” and then pull out the top few lessons you believe you learned in each of those roles. That adds up to your current set of skills. (Location 1609)

The second part is to think about a goal you want to set: “What do I want to be doing five to ten years from now?” The objective here is to think big and not limit yourself to options that are obvious or in a “straight line” to what you are doing now. (Location 1611)

The third step is to look at the gaps between the skills you have now and those required for where you want to be so you understand what it’s going to take to get there. And then you can think about specific roles and projects you can take on between here and there to make sure you’re on the path that is heading to the horizon, to where you want to be. (Location 1618)

YOU CAN TAKE ONLY SO MANY POWER 10S (Location 1625)

Selectively leveraging “all in” moments will help ensure the team feels like they are being challenged without being pushed too far. (Location 1637)

3. FOSTER CONNECTIONS (Location 1639)

BASK IN RELATIONSHIPS (Location 1644)

By combining his amazing memory about what makes someone unique with his gift of storytelling, my dad is able to expertly weave people together like yarn, making connections between new people who don’t yet know each other, and who often end up to be great friends. (Location 1650)

THE POWER OF COMMUNITY (Location 1657)

One thing that all the successful communities have in common is one or a small number of group administrators who serve as “hosts” for the communities. They welcome people to the group when they join, they set the tone and culture, they monitor and remove bad behavior when it happens, and they add new content and ideas to the group, especially early on. (Location 1662)

Caterina Fake, the founder of Flickr, told me that starting a community is like hosting a cocktail party. When people arrive, you need to take their coats, offer them drinks, introduce them to a few people—make them feel comfortable (and step in if someone else insults them). If this early hosting is done well, then the community begins to blossom on its own, with many more members taking on the same types of activities that the initial founders did—adding content, welcoming members, setting the tone. And once many people are participating, these communities really begin to thrive. (Location 1664)

RESPECT IS EARNED (Location 1676)

When I ask my team to work late trying to reach an important goal or ship a product on time, I make sure I’m there with them—in the office or online—making it clear we’re in this together. And I listen openly to any feedback they have about how I can be more effective. When you ask people to join you to support your movement—whether launching a new product or fighting for a new law—whatever your cause, if you want to inspire people, make sure that you are in it together, working as hard or harder than others you ask to help. (Location 1689)

VULNERABILITY = POWER (Location 1693)

moments of vulnerability and openness that spark the greatest change, especially when vulnerability serves to build tighter connections between a leader and his or her team. (Location 1695)

EVERYBODY’S GOT SOMETHING (Location 1729)

PART OF INSPIRING a team is letting them know that you care not only about the vision you are working to achieve but also about the people you are working with. And showing you care means demonstrating you understand that no matter how dedicated people are to the movement you are building, they also have lives, families, and commitments outside of it. (Location 1729)

One of my favorite books is Everybody’s Got Something, by Good Morning America co-anchor Robin Roberts. It is a memoir about her life, and in particular about her experience surviving both breast cancer and then a rare type of blood cancer, and is all about this humbling idea of perspective. (Location 1741)

ASSUME THE BEST (Location 1796)

There is a lot of research describing what social psychologists call the “Fundamental Attribution Error”—that people often ascribe the negative actions of others to innate characteristics, i.e., “who they are” rather than considering situational variables. And not surprisingly, we tend to do the exact opposite when interpreting our own behavior. (Location 1805)

BRING LIFE INTO YOUR WORK (Location 1823)

It is common in social organizing for people to start by learning about each other and building deep and authentic relationships that help the group navigate challenges together. This is starting to happen in more and more organizations, from schools to companies. (Location 1826)

Lifelines: Break people into small groups, and ask everyone to describe three to five key moments or events in their lives that have influenced who they are today. It’s an amazing way to break down the barriers between people and gain a deeper understanding of one another. These conversations are kept strictly confidential between the group members and, as a result, build enormous trust. (Location 1831)

Storytelling: Building upon the lifeline exercise, encourage people to tell a meaningful story about their life in front of a larger group. One of the most memorable sessions we ever had at a company retreat was to hold a storytelling night in front of a campfire. Ten people from the company had volunteered to tell a powerful story from their lives in front of the whole company, which they had rehearsed beforehand. The stories we heard that night had us laughing and sobbing and appreciating the courage of the people who were willing to share so much of themselves. And their willingness to be exposed made everyone more willing to be open with each other. (Location 1835)

Appreciations: One of the most effective techniques I have seen to ^^build trust within a group is appreciations^^. At the end of a project or an off-site meeting, we ask the group to share things they appreciate about each other. We go around the circle, giving each person a few minutes to be appreciated. The rest of the group can chime in with reasons why they appreciate that person, ideally using specific examples. (Location 1840)

Tools that build deeper understanding between people add value to teams of any kind, from universities to traditional businesses to sports teams. (Location 1854)

TAKE ONE FOR THE TEAM (Location 1856)

Sometimes the best way to build trust and loyalty is to let yourself be the butt of a joke or embarrass yourself for the good of the team. (Location 1866)

Nevertheless, if you want to start a movement, you need to be prepared to face criticism, both the helpful kind and the less than helpful kind. (Location 1889)

So build an army. Even if you don’t have a petition where your army can sign on, find those people that are behind you and give them a way to join you. (Location 1939)

Your army doesn’t have to agree with every move you make, and some of your supporters may also have suggestions and feedback for you that will make you better, but find people who believe in you and in your cause. Put more positive around you than negative, and it can boost you up, even amid the cruelest of trolls. (Location 1942)

There is a classic example of the Bear Hug in a wonderful StoryCorps piece that originally aired on NPR’s Latino USA from 2008. A young man, Julio Diaz, tells the story of how he is mugged at knifepoint on his way home by a teenager. In addition to giving the teen his wallet, as demanded, Julio also offered him something he hadn’t asked for. “Hey, wait a minute,” he told the teen before he ran off. “You forgot something. If you’re going to be robbing people for the rest of the night, you might as well take my coat to keep you warm.” Ultimately, the two ended up in conversation over dinner at Julio’s favorite diner, where—seeing the kindness Julio showed everyone from the manager to the dishwashers to the waiters when they all stopped by their table to say hello—the teen realized he could approach life differently. He gave Julio back his wallet and also surrendered his knife in return for dinner, a small amount of money, and for the unexpected show of kindness, which was so rare in this young man’s life. (Location 2059)

And coaches don’t have to be “better” than you, they just have to have a different perspective and set of experiences that make you better. (Location 2152)

This thing that we call “failure” is not the falling down, but the staying down. —MARY PICKFORD (Location 2201)

The key to success is holding on to the belief that you’ll have more sunny days than cloudy ones and to just keep climbing, every day, no matter what. Great leaders not only keep climbing on both types of days but also inspire their teams to climb with them. (Location 2218)

destigmatized failure by instituting something called the “Festival of Failure,” a method to encourage people to share their failures in a way that others could learn from as well. It wasn’t formalized in one single way across the company. Instead, each team adapted the idea to its own workflow. Some global or functional teams had a Festival of Failure section in each weekly team call in which people chimed in with recent failure examples. The engineering team, whose members do demos with each other every week to show what they’ve been working on, would periodically have their own “Festival of Failure” demos to show examples of mistakes they made or code they broke and what they learned. The festivals highlight failure as a learning opportunity without shaming people for mistakes. They help us recognize that we all have failures, especially when we are trying to do ambitious things. There is no shame in that. The only shame is in not sharing the failures we make so others can learn from and avoid them. (Location 2275)

This combination of the belief in their business, their belief in themselves, and their belief in each other was key to getting them through the many obstacles and moments that felt like they might lead to failure, and being able to turn them around. (Location 2417)

In a 2015 study, Dr. Gail Matthews at Dominican University of California recruited 267 people from a variety of backgrounds and industries and asked them to take various actions on business-related goals they hoped to accomplish within a four-week block. Participants were randomly assigned to one of five groups with varying levels of commitment, starting with just “thinking” about their goals and rating them on different dimensions, and then increasing in additional commitments by writing down the goals, by writing down the goals and the action commitments, by doing all of the above and sharing action commitments with a friend, and finally by doing all of those steps while also sending a weekly progress report to a friend. (Location 2432)

continually reinforce growth mindset values with concrete policies.” (Location 2563)

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Bibliography [[To Read]] and [[To Research]]

The Business Case for Purpose, a report: Harvard Business Review Analytic Services and EY Beacon Institute, The Business Case for Purpose (Harvard Business School Publishing, 2015), http://www.ey.com/Publication/vwLUAssets/ey-the-business-case-for-purpose/$FILE/ey-the-business-case-for-purpose.pdf. (Location 2754)

Marshall Ganz, a senior lecturer: Marshall Ganz. “What Is Public Narrative: Self, Us & Now, 2009.” (Public Narrative Worksheet). Working Paper. http://nrs.harvard.edu/urn-3:HUL.InstRepos:30760283 [inactive] and https://dash.harvard.edu/bitstream/handle/1/30760283/Public-Narrative-Worksheet-Fall-2013-.pdf?sequence=1 (Location 2788)

In his TED talk about starting movements: Derek Sivers, “How to Start a Movement,” filmed February 2010 at TED2010, TED video, 3:09, https://www.ted.com/talks/derek_sivers_how_to_start_a_movement. (Location 2800)

Wharton professor and bestselling author Adam Grant: A. M. Grant, E. M. Campbell, G. Chen, K. Cottone, D. Lapedis, and K. Lee, “Impact and the Art of Motivation Maintenance: The Effects of Contact with Beneficiaries on Persistence Behavior, Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes 103 (2007), 53–67. (Location 2858)

As Zenger and Folkman describe: Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman, “If Your Boss Thinks You’re Awesome, You Will Become More Awesome,” Harvard Business Review, January 27, 2015, http://hbr.org/2015/01/if-your-boss-thinks-youre-awesome-you-will-become-more-awesome. (Location 2871)

Research by Alison Wood Brooks and Francesca Gino: Alison Wood Brooks and Francesca Gino, “Asking Advice Makes a Good Impression,” Scientific American, March 1, 2015, http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/asking-advice-makes-a-good-impression1/. (Location 2874)

an increasing amount of research shows that humor: Alan W. Gray, Brian Parkinson, and Robin I. Dunbar, “Laughter’s Influence on the Intimacy of Self-Disclosure,” Human Nature 26, no. 1 (March 2015), https://doi.org/10.1007/s12110-015-9225-8. (Location 2908)

There is a classic example of the Bear Hug: “A Victim Treats His Mugger Right,” Morning Edition, NPR, March 28, 2008, http://www.npr.org/2008/03/28/89164759/a-victim-treats-his-mugger-right. (Location 2940)

“I was more likely to report seeing a UFO”: Amram Shapiro, Louise Firth Campbell, and Rosalind Wright. The Book of Odds: From Lightning Strikes to Love at First Sight, the Odds of Everyday Life (New York: William Morrow, 2014). (Location 2967)

In a 2015 study, Dr. Gail Matthews: “Study Focuses on Strategies for Achieving Goals, Resolutions,” Dominican University of California, http://www.dominican.edu/dominicannews/study-highlights-strategies-for-achieving-goals. (Location 2973)

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